If you know me, then you know that I'm ALWAYS busy. I'm often very relieved that I don't have a 40 hour/week job as I'm sure I would never get time to sleep or eat. There were times when I was working 3-4 small jobs at once (none of them more then 10 hours a week) and as work in those jobs slowly began to fizzle, I found myself just as busy as ever. Maybe the world can't grasp the concept that work-from-home-wife does not equal full-time-soap-opera-watcher-and-bon-bon-eater. So I began to say "no" for the first time in my life. I even scheduled "NO!" days on my calendar...I had at least one of those a week and at least one "NO!" weekend a month. And slowly, but surely, my calendar began to clear. I found myself, FINALLY, only working 2 days a week (for the Edwards') and even had entire days when I could just do things that I wanted to do. I didn't have to go anywhere or do anything for anyone else. I was making a little extra money, had time for myself and was finally really satisfied with how my time was being spent.
And here I am on my first afternoon of being unemployed. Due to the current economic status, the luxury of a part-time nanny was one that the Edwards' could no longer afford. Today as little Yannick (who is 4 now) came up to me before nap and thanked me for making his bed so pretty (which pretty much equals me making the bed and putting all his animals on it) I knew for sure that I'd miss them like crazy. While I know we'll see them occassionally, it will definitely be different when I don't get to see them twice a week.
So now what? Do I look for another job? Wait a minute...don't I already have a job? Ummm, yeah I do. In all the chaos that has consumed my calendar for the past year, I would often forget that my most important job is being a stay at home wife. Yes, that means cleaning and laundry and doing dishes and organizing (which are mostly somewhat fun things...well, for me anyway!) but it also means creating a home for us that is a loving place to be. It means having time to use the creativity and talent that God has blessed me with, so that I can bless others. But I think that most important thing that it means is that I get to do the things for me that I need to do to be the best wife I can be to the man that God has given me. So, I'm not "employed" in the sense that I get a paycheck and have benefits and get vacation time. But, I'm down to one "job" and it's probably one of the most important ones I'll ever have.